91/365

This is my completely unflattering up close picture of my face in an awkward pose. The most literal description ever.

I'm super tired. I have no idea why, but I feel exhausted.
A nap is in order.

90/365

I'm super tired. So, this is the silliest one yet due to me just wanting to go crash out. I made my eyeball it's own planetary body. I guess those can be either two suns from far away or it has two bright stars orbiting it. The fact that I'm discussing the idea of my eyeball as part of an imaginary solar system is silly. I'm going to bed now.

89/365

Warning: scanning your face with you eye open leads to temporary pain and blindness in one eye. Don't do it. This one was fun to do though. I guess I owe that bad Elisha Cuthbert movie a nod for inspiration. Haven't seen it, but the buried alive thing doesn't seem very fun.

We went and saw New Moon tonight. I just want to smash my head into the wall continuously for hours knowing what these die hard twilight fans are going to see in the next film. A baby that eats her from the inside out and a werewolf that is 18 will choose a mate in her baby. Something is wrong with Stephanie Meyer. I read all the books on the planes to and from Japan last year. I left each book on the plane for whatever person got my seat after me. Hopefully they were delighted.

I have my nerdy obsessions, so I'm not going to judge the obsessive twihards. But, it's a bit unnerving they are so young and are looking to Edward Cullen as an attainable character in a man. That's the scary thing.

88/365

mirror, mirror.

We saw Ninja Assassin tonight. More like Ninja Ass. Since when do ninjas whisper to each other when attacking someone? I thought they were supposed to be quiet and silent killers. They contradicted themselves so many times in that movie. The main guy was a part of the Ozunu clan. But, the main character lady kept saying Izunu. The sound EEEE and OHHH sound very different.

Stephen and I were joking that if the ninjas were gay, when they had their silent conversations and whisperings before killing someone, they could say things like "omg he is so not wearing that. Does he realize that makes his ass look fat?" Now say this line while whispering and speaking very fast. Yup, Stephen and I were being 10 years old and laughing our butts off.

There were so many bad one liners the MST3K people would have killed. One like "Did you like it when I stuck her?"
You are asking for it when you put that in a movie and during a "serious" scene.

87/365

The hills are alive with the sound of music...

farm hill music. duh-duh- duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh (in the tune of dueling banjos)

86/365

Thanksgiving eve. I dunno if it was just me and my hypersensitivity to cold or if it WAS just super cold. Either way, I had to double jacket and blanket it up for this picture. I love the farm. It's best on quiet weekends. It's not that I don't love to see my family for the holidays, but it's a great escape when it's just you and the open sky.

85/365

Stephen will figure out how to work a still camera one of these days. He was surprised by the auto focus button. Ah, my award winning director. He knows a thing or two about film cameras, but not still ones. ??
He did get this good shot that's a bit soft. But, it conveys how much fun and how long it's been since i've done a handstand. Whew. That hurt after doing it for 2 minutes straight.

84/365

In the belly of the beast and trying to push falling dvd's back in with my foot. deeerrrrrr.

Hopefully third time's a charm

I'm once again on my way back to Japan with a starting date of February 2010 and onwards. I'm more hoping that placement doesn't come to me until March. I need that time to save some money, especially after I buy a plane ticket. I'm going with a company that has a good reputation by word of mouth and from just general googling, hasn't had any really big major red flags.

I've been promised a Kinki region placement which is even better. That is the area I wanted to go and honestly, if I hadn't found a company that would put me in that exact location, then I was going to just let the Japan thing die. If I hadn't gotten the job, I was going to let it go. It was this is it or this is when I say I'm done. It took me a year to get out of that slump that JET put me in. It was extremely difficult and the effect of failure or the general feeling of failing even though it wasn't your failure, but rather the company's, it still hurt.

So, I let the Japan thing go for a good year. But, it always stayed there at the back of my mind. Once again, after interviewing in San Francisco, I got the job. I was half expecting not to make the cut since I am "a bit reserved." Once I'm with a group of students though, I feel I can be lively. I hope so anyways. I'm not in the game completely yet though. I have to make it through training before I get the full go ahead.

I just hope I can forge some friendships at training that will help me through the year. I want to be able to have friends and people to talk to.

It's a broken record, but leaving behind my talented and lovely boyfriend and my baby dog is going to be extremely difficult. But, in a way, it's like asking Stephen not to make films. I have to do this. I have to try it out for at least the year that will be my contract. Then if the year is up and I can't stand it, I will come home feeling at least I did it. I did what I planned to do for so long. I'm getting much older and 30 is approaching much more quickly than I anticipated. It's kinda scary to think about it.
I'm 26, yet I feel like I have so much to learn. I have so much to do and take care of in my life.

My best friend Brandy wants a family and is already talking of kids. My friends from high school and childhood friends of mine are having children. I feel like "Should I be there too?" Is that where i'm supposed to be in my life? Am I or should I be focusing on a family right now? The answer for me is no. I don't have a job that would support me or a child. At this point, I'm too selfish to be responsible for another life right now. I still have dreams that have yet to be fulfilled for myself. I want to keep traveling. I want to see the world. If that's what the teaching route will give me, then so be it.

I want a job I love. I love Vulcan Video. It's like a family to me at that store. There are things about it that get frustrating, but it falls by the wayside because the job itself is so easy and the people I've met and the things I've experienced with Vulcan have been amazing. They are all good people at that store. I hope to be a vulcanite for life.

Leaving Vulcan too will be difficult. I left the store once for japan and when that didn't work out, they kindly let me back into the fold. I love them for it.

But, really. This is something I need to do and I'm excited and scared all over again. My reservations for what to expect are very low. I think I held JET to a high standard and that's where I went wrong.

So, I'm hoping this third time is the charm. Please God, let it be the time.

83/365

As angelic as I'm ever going to be.
Or even as a fresco painting.

82/365

Homemade christmas lamps. Christmas decorating just around the corner!

81/365

robodanica

80/365

A bit behind, but the next picture will hopefully make up for it.

79/365

I've been messing and picking at my fingers since I was in 2nd grade. It's not the prettiest thing to look at, but it's a part of me. It's deep seeded and I mess with my fingers sometimes without even realizing I'm peeling away a layer of skin. I've noticed my fingers are noticeably raw after an intense movie or especially before interviews and things of that nature. It's the way I let out stress and I really wish I could find a way to quite destroying my hands. I'll never have those pretty fingertips and french nails. Mine are always going to be gnarled and short. I've come to accept it.

78/365

late mornings. errr, mid afternoons.

77/365

Waiting patiently like a good mom would.

76/365

Do you remember the TV show "The Flash?" I wanted to be lightning fast for a long time after I watched that show.

75/365

Kill your Television.

74/365

Ghiradelli Mint Chocolate Hot Fudge Sundae + Great company = Happiness.

73/365

Biked the Golden Gate Bridge! We rode for about 5 hours into some small towns past the bridge and my butt hurt the entire day after. It was so beautiful considering the sky was clear and there was no fog the entire time I was there. It was such a great experience and catching up with Brandy was so much fun.

72/365

I'm once again under the sea.

71/365

Brandy and I are just rad. End of story. :P

70/365

Alcatraz.

69/365

People in San Francisco do NOT need gyms. They only need to walk around the block. This specific hill was at a nice 45 degree angle, possibly steeper.

68/365

San Francisco.

67/365

I leave for San Francisco early Saturday morning. So, my 365 might be behind while i'm there. I dunno just yet, but most likely. Wish me luck at my interview!

66/365

portrait by stephen huff.

65/365

Sunset.



Hair is on fire!



Endless sky

64/365

test. test. test.

My camera is so clean, crisp, and working like a dream. I'm just testing it out and having an almost like-new camera again. I didn't realize how sluggish and blurry it was. 2+ years of use and traveling to Japan and PA in the snow would probably do that. Glad to have my friend back and in top condition.

Looking on some of my older photos with it, I noticed that there were some graininess issues, but the main concern was that my autofocus was not working. Auto focus is your best friend when taking self portraits. It also seemed to have issues with color clarity that it used to have. That was the best $250 I've spent in a long time. I'm glad I finally had the initiative to take it in to get looked over. I mean, the thing has been in use constantly for the past 2 years at the least. It went to Japan in it's humid months, PA in it's snowy months, and countless other locations I can imagine have effected it.

I know. I'm writing about something that is boring and is a "duh" thing, but I can't get over how great it's working and looking now. I will learn my lesson from this and start taking my stuff in for regular cleanings. I wish I could do that with my mac.
I rely on it more than anything else. But, I bought a Terabyte HD about 6 months ago. Back your stuff up! If working at Apple taught me anything, it's to back up your stuff always. Back up everything. Spend that $100 for a good external HD. I guarantee you will not regret it.

blah. talky talky tonight.

63/365

No makeup. You can see the dark circles under my eyes. I need a day to do nothing but lay in bed and nothing else.

62/365

"Who's gonna drive you home, tonight?" Best cars song ever. The song played while I was on my way to work and so I decided to capture me in a car playing "drive" by the cars. Ah, my ridiculous ideas.

61/365

Angry BUMBLEBEEEE! Happy Halloween!

60/365

Here is my costume in full. It took about an hour to do the makeup and it turned out just as I wanted it. So, I'm pretty happy with the outcome and the full ensemble.

59/365

Poor baby Kaya. She thinks I'm insane. I'm sure of it.

58365

This was taken at a Harvest Party thrown by my coworker Jared and his housemates. He had an awesome set-up to take photos and he took a set of me. Unfortunately, my crotch was right towards the camera in the most unflattering way. So, I cropped it and voila, me and a pumpkin.